ave maria di lourdes

I’m convinced that you can relive memories through your senses more accurately than flipping through a photo album.

When our kids are asked what they remember most about our summer trip to Italy, they often say the taste of rich gelato. More recently, my daughter mentions the memory and sound of bells chiming from church towers.

I know exactly what day she is remembering. We were staying in the hills just south of Florence taking a walk overlooking the olive trees surrounding our apartment.

A nearby church tower began chiming. Then another joined in from farther away. And another. They played off each other and continued for a good five or ten minutes. The bell chimes bounced off the distant hills and filled the air. This chorus of bells against a backdrop of silence stopped us in our tracks as we listened. When my husband and I lived in Italy, the sounds of church bells were an everyday occurrence – we hardly noticed some days. But on that day it was a beautiful and memorable shared experience between mother and daughter.

My daughter’s memory reminds me that I do miss the church bells. I don’t hear them at home. When we lived in Italy,  the local town church chimed an unfogettable and beautiful song only on Sundays. So over the years, I’d often sit on our balcony high up on the hill and listen. I knew I could count on hearing it each week. My mother recognized the song as ”Ave Maria di Lourdes” because she listened to it as a child growing up in Germany. To confirm it was the song, I found a version on youtube.  Take a listen and perhaps it will take you back to a country or time that is special to you.

travel is the best investment for kids

It’s back to school time and I agree with whoever said public schools should sponsor and promote ‘travel teams’ much like sports teams, because of the  life lessons the act of traveling provides young people. Our trip to Italy earlier this summer has left a lasting impression on our two children and reinforced a key family value of the importance of exposing them to different cultures from an early age – even if it’s a trade-off to a bigger house, newer appliances or a nicer car.

Stazione Santa Lucia, Venice

Read about my tips on traveling in Italy with kids here through my interview this month with travel, art and culture blog, This is My Happiness.

top 3 new experiences this spring in Italy

On our trip back to Italy last month, we walked a lot down memory lane – visiting our old apartments, old jobs, old friends, favorite beaches, buildings, bars and restaurants. The children were gracious, my oldest posing in front of the hospital she was born and standing on the lungolago for a picture where I strolled her endlessly years ago.

But what was equally enjoyable was the creation of new memories with our children through new experiences in an old country with endless things to discover.

Three of our favorite new Italian finds this Spring include:

Visiting the Madame Fisscher exhibit at Palazzo Grassi, Venice (through July 15, 2012)

Even if you are not a contemporary art fan or have had enough of Venice (but is that possible in the city that never gets old?), it may be worth visiting this exhibit if only to  enter the breathtaking Palazzo Grassi for the first time.

From the brochure, “The exhibit offers a journey through Urs Fischer’s artistic career from the nineties to today.  His work, characterized by humor, penchant for paradox and virtuosity of execution, employes simultaneously an extraordinary diversity of media and materials.  It calls into question the history of art and sculpture, our relationship to the body, the notion of time and the status of the object.”  Our favorites include “Untitled”,  two men in candle wax allowing visitors to witness the transformation as the flame burns (the head representing Fischer himself had fallen into his hands when we were there) and the idea of the importance of all processes of transformation, the body’s endurance and duration of artwork; Jeff Koons monumental pink “Balloon Dog” (which is used to contrast a nearby Fischer work);  “A Light Sigh is the Sound of my Life”,  an enormous sphere, slowly rotating on itself made of different materials (what looked like skin and hair). My daughter also gave a thumbs up to the “floating” cigarette box  hung by a thin wire from the ceiling while the naked professional model/woman in the ”Necrophonia” room was a surprise.

Eating at GustaPizza, Florence

Near Piazza Santo Spirito in Florence I ate some of the best pizza I’ve had in central and northern Italy. Our friend who lives in the area introduced it to us. Delicious and affordable,  my pizza came with rucola and grana (above) while the kids had Margherita. If you are traveling in the area this summer, this casual restaurant is not to miss.

Renting a motorboat, Lago di Garda

All the years we lived on the lake, while we enjoyed its stunning water by ferry-boat and swimming, it’s hard to believe we never rented a boat. On the lungolago in our old village of Toscolano Maderno, you can rent a motor boat for an hour for 75 euros. While a splurge for us, the kids agree it was one of the best activities we chose to do on the trip. The views of the villas and castles and mountains lining the coast are best experienced by boat. The boats go fast enough to feel the thrill of bumping over small waves and wind through the hair.

earth day air drying

In the past I’ve posted about good habits I picked up abroad that I’ve stuck with.

Today, I put one into action for Earth Day. Our temperatures have warmed up sufficiently to begin air drying my family’s clothes again. 

Years ago you would have heard me complaining about the lack of dryers found in Italy, particularly in winter when clothes took over the house, placed on top of water heaters to dry. But today I fully appreciate doing without some American “luxuries” and reap the many benefits of hangdrying clothes.

Your clothes feel better. Your clothes smell better. Your clothes will iron easier. And… they will last longer.

Not to mention, you feel fantastic sucking up less of Mother Earth’s energy in the form of a dryer.

Happy Earth Day from Bringing Travel Home! Are you doing anything special today to honor Mother Earth?

french parenting lessons

Last week I discovered the Wall Street Journal article “Why French Parents are Superior,” by American expat, journalist and author Pamela Druckerman. It wasn’t more than two paragraphs down when my head began shaking up and down uncontrollably - like a marionette doll at the Luxembourg Gardens – in agreement and recollection from my time abroad.  The article discussed her book released last week,”Bringing up Bebe: One American Mother Discovers the Wisdom of French Parenting.”

Druckerman, raising her children in Paris, describes the French parent’s ability to achieve outcomes so many American parents seem to have such difficulty with. Like teaching our children to sleep through the night, eat and sit nicely at meals (no ginormous bags of pirate booty and pretzels every half hour might just help, dontcha think?), properly and politely greet adults, avoid interrupting and play on their own. The French practices of teaching respect, patience, self-control and delayed gratification – with easy, calm authority (“big eyes” she calls them), and being involved with the family without being obsessive are key points, according to Druckerman, and hard to come by in my parts these days.

Our baby was under a year old when we returned  to the States, yet I still got a small taste of the parenting style in Northern Italy. And I do say Druckerman’s observations are not just a French thing.  I encountered some similar characteristics with many families there. At  birthday parties, children played happily together while parents sat on chairs – not down on the floor  – and enjoyed a glass of wine. Down the hill from our house was a part playground/part outdoor cafe (Awesome Idea. Why has it not caught on here?). Moms chatted and drank coffee – guilt-free- while the children played. At pick-up time at the local Italian preschool, parents were not even allowed in the playground area. The kids were having so much fun together they hardly noticed. Finally, the children knew they were expected to greet adults. As Judith Warner writes this week in  “Why American Kids are Brats” for Time.com, saying hello and goodbye helps them to learn that they aren’t the only ones with feelings.

Parenting styles will come and go. I’ve tried them all. I’ll admit it, after reading one book when I was desperate, I even followed the advice to roar (yes, roar) with my toddler as she melted down - giving voice, I guess, to the temper tantrum. Some experts say feed their ego or they’ll grow up with no confidence. Others say don’t feed their ego – if you do, they won’t be prepared for life’s hard lessons. Be their best friend. Be not their best friend - show who is boss! But the article suggests that amidst helicopter and other kinds of current popular  parenting styles, some core, common sense lessons have gone lost and forgotten – like setting boundaries and teaching manners, good behavior and respect for who’s in control.

Even though she makes the point that French parents aren’t perfect, I imagine this book, like all others on parenting, could ignite a heated debate. But it makes a lot of sense to me. Maybe I’m an example of a new kind of American mom, who went to too many Positive Parenting workshops early in my mom career, and years later, hear myself telling my kids “No means no because I said so!”  Then realizing this is exactly the message I want to send them.

To read more about Pamela Druckerman and her new book,  ”Bringing up Bebe: One American Mother Discovers the Wisdom of French Parenting,” visit http://www.pameladruckerman.com/books/

UPDATE: “Teaching Self-Control, the American Way” is a fantastic NY Times editorial that came out in response to the attention this book has been getting.

m. sasek’s great cities of the world

The other day while my son searched for a book on snakes in the library’s reference section, I popped over to the next aisle to search for books on Europe for his older sister. With an upcoming trip there and her big 8-year-old appetite for information, I wanted to find something fun and imaginative - beyond what the guide books that fill our bookshelves at home offered. I located the section and flipped past a few fact-heavy books on Roman and Renaissance Cities, the stereotypical-hokey Italian food and culture guides, and an atlas, when I came across several large books inserted sideways. In cursive on the binding it read “This is Paris.” Next to it was “This is London”. Then I found it. “This is Venice.” Jackpot.

What a find.  (We plan a day trip to Venice on our trip.) Written by Czech author and illustrator M. Sasek, (1916-1980) his award-winning classic stories on the great cities of the world were first published in the early 1960s and re-issued. In “This is Venice”, he brings young readers the charm of the city with imaginative, playful, really beautiful illustrations and amusing verse with just enough information - and the right kind – for an 8-year-old. Before you know it, you are experiencing the essence of Venice – venetian specialties like glass and lace, gondola specs (eight different kinds of wood are used to build one!), the pigeons, a unique system of house numbering – along with other historical information and tourist attractions. Not one rating or checklist of “must-sees.”  Instead he has captured and shares with children the simple truths and beauty of Venice through his words and keen sensitive eye.

“The water brings scenery to the theatre – melons to the housewives – and tourists to Venice.”

“As much as Venice loves the water, the water loves Venice.”

“The most romantic sight is the Grand Canal at night.”  (or, from experience, early morning – one of my favorite Venetian moments. Ever.)

A 150 page information-filled guide with sleek, laminated pull out maps just can’t – and won’t –  do that.

A true gift for the reader is the back page of explanations corresponding to asterisks found on a few pages in the book. While his story is timely and current, a few changes are inevitable and the publishers, naturally, want to correct outdated information for accuracy. But this is the best stuff. For example:

Page 47. * “Today the pigeons in Piazzo Marco are no longer fed by an official, but you can buy corn at kiosks and feed them yourselves!”

Page 58 * “Today you will no longer see watermelon stands in Venice. However, many vendors sell fruit salad to keep you cool in the summer. And there haven’t been horses at the Lido since the 1980s.”

This is our kind of guide book.

pigeon photo credit and for more information on the This is series: http://www.miroslavsasek.com

corsica of course

Planning our next trip abroad  has us returning to the Mediterranean, a place I can’t stay away from too long. Some of our best travel memories involve swimming in this wonderful, sparkly, salty sea, off the rocks in Agay, France or Monterosso, Italy. A trip most memorable was when our daughter was three months old, we were living in Italy and we took our first family vacation to the beautifully natural island of Corsica.

We (and our car) hopped a traghetto from Savona, Italy to Bastia on the island of Corsica, France.

Heart pajamas were a good choice that day, as they smoothed an unfortunate and unnecessary encounter with police at a routine traffic stop on our drive down, due to a mix up with our car maintenance papers. (Even armed Italian policemen won’t resist a cute baby.)

We loved Bastia, with its surprisingly urban city feeling on an otherwise natural island. There we got a great feel for the unique Corsican character which is sprinkled with a little Italian and a little French, due to a history involving both countries (Corsica was under Genovese rule until  1729 when the Corsicans revolted and enjoyed independence for a short 40-year period, later ceding to France in  1769 . They still have an uneasy relationship with mainland France, at least it was the case many years ago, and Bastia has been the target of bomb explosions by Corsican militants).

Ferries arrive to Bastia's port

We drove down the Eastern coast of the island to Santa Giulia. There, at the recommendation of friends, we rented a villa at Les Toits de Santa Giulia  and every morning went for a swim in the nearby bay.  The beaches there and nearby were beautiful in  September, and the sparkling water and red rock formations were breathtaking.

the bay of Santa Giulia

La plage de Palombaggia was the most unforgettable beach (and likely the coolest place I’ve nursed a baby.)

the beach and beautiful red rock formations at Palombaggia

The nearest town, Porto Vecchio, offered a delicious bakery and creperie, just in time to remind us we were in France, as it’s easy to forget with so many reminders of Italy. Porto Vecchio has always been a “remember when?” moment, when we purchased a much too expensive International Herald Tribune to satiate my english language news craving, and driving off, watched each of its pages fly off the top of the car, where I had left it. (I blamed it on new mom mushy brain).

A highlight was the drive down to Bonifacio, at the southern most point of the island.

Citadel and cliffs of Bonifacio

The reconstructed and renovated citadel was originally built in the 9th century along with the foundation of the city. Bonifacio is known for its chalk-white limestone, sculpted in unusual shapes by the ocean. Not a stroller-friendly town, baby was put in the carrier and we explored this town on foot. Standing on the cliffs, we could see Sardegna.

white limestone cliffs of bonifacio with sardegna in the distance

This year we won’t make it back to Corsica, but we are researching islands not far from it, closer to the Italian coast and in the Tuscan archipelago. Whatever the weather when we arrive, my first order of business will be to jump in and take a swim in my most favorite sea of all.

el dia de los muertos

Being of (half) mexican descent but with little-felt cultural identity (sadly, I can’t even figure out how to type a spanish accent on a vowel), el dia de los muertos (Nov. 1st and 2nd) is a nice opportunity to celebrate a holiday of my ancestors by remembering those friends and family members who have died. At my daughter’s spanish immersion elementary school, her class has been making sugar skulls and this week they will be preparing an altar where we are invited to place photos of someone special in our family who has died. My late father will be represented.

At a local gallery this weekend, we poked around a wonderful dia del los muertos exhibit by local Northern California artists featuring fun skeleton figures and a beautiful, large, colorful altar with sugar skulls, candles, pictures, and offerings of favorite foods and items of those being honored (included was a toothbrush and tube of toothpaste in honor of a former dentist and namesake of the gallery). My daughter enjoyed sitting on the floor and sketching the larger skeleton figures, including “Amy, Amy, Amy (Amy Winehouse), “King of Pop”, La Sirena and el Virgen de Guadalupe (some of which you can see in the above photo).

Scholars trace the origins of this modern-day Mexican holiday to indigenous observances dating back hundreds of years and to an Aztec festival dedicated to a goddess called Mictecacihuatl.   You can read more about dia de los muertos  here.

This time of year, I much prefer it to Halloween and the creepy tombstone decorations popping up on people’s front lawns everywhere and endless amounts of junkie candy yet to come. El dia de los muertos is a festive event -  perhaps at times even humorous – accepting death as another step in life and remembering those who have gone before us.  In some way, for me, the altar and artwork created in honor of this holiday connects the living with the dead in a very natural, uplifting, healthy sort of way.

This coming week, there will be dia de los muertos celebrations, art exhibits and other educational events taking place throughout cities across the world open for anyone to take part as an observer or a participant. If you plan to celebrate, or if you prepare a private family altar, I’d love to hear about it.

living well is the best revenge

I’ve  just put down a book titled the same as this post, which adds to a running list of books I’ve read recently recounting life in the magical 1920s Paris.

Living Well is the Best Revenge - first published  in 1971 - describes the early lives of American expats Gerald and Sara Murphy. They intentionally moved to France when disenchanted with the States (with three young children!), and exchanged a safe, predictable life for an unconventional life they created abroad. Aside from Gerald Murphy’s brief but remarkable painting career and an impressive group of friends, they are known for inventing the French Riviera summer season back when tourists split after Spring and sunbathing was rare (no kidding) and when they bought and fixed up a home they called Villa America in Cap d’Antibes.

No one did Living Well quite like the Murphys. They had a love and passion for life and lived it to its fullest.

Villa America became the gathering epicenter for their friends -  the who’s who of the 1920s arts and letters expat scene like Picasso, Hemingway and Fitzgerald -  and it was said no one did Living Well quite like the hospitable, sociable, creative, privileged Murphys. Gerald believed only the invented part of their life (creation of their own happiness, I presume)  held beauty until uncontrollable life events later stepped in and ”blundered, scarred and destroyed.”

Sara Murphy's beads on the beach

Hostess with the Mostess: Perfecting the Art of Living

The Murphys lived the good life  - creating a happy, pleasurable life surrounded by  family, friends, dinner parties, beauty, fresh flowers and beach picnics including a daily mid-morning glass of sherry - even though they had less dinero than many of their expat friends. Their hospitality, adventurous spirit, and love for life and the arts, music and books drew people to them. They were generous and supportive (and social connectors) to their friends, many who were emerging artists and writers. They loved their family. They pursued their passions. Described as rebels, they cared little what others thought of them or of their lifestyle.

"Razor" by Gerald Murphy - a brief painting career and ahead of his time

Travel, a great education in living well.

In my experience, living abroad inspires one to live well. For me that means a number of things. Like good food. Family. Togetherness. Creating a beautiful home – no matter where and what size –  that reflects your life and experiences.  Enjoyment of the present, even the mundane events. Creating your own happiness and a life you choose to live – not what others want or is expected. A passion for life and adventure. Curiosity in places, people, and the arts. Appreciation of beauty. From another time, Gerald and Sara Murphy are still an inspirational couple and remind us through this book that living well is the best revenge.

How has travel or living abroad influenced you to Live Well ?

found: bicycle culture in america

One of the things I love most about Europe is its bicycle culture. Bikes leaning against canals in Amsterdam. On wobbly cobblestone roads peddled by pradas in Italy. With a pain au chocolat bouncing in its basket in Provence. Cheap, self-rented Velibs in Paris.

we shipped my bike from Italy when we returned to the States, so it has cruised both sides of the Atlantic.

So,when we returned home, it’s not by chance that our family chose to put down roots  in a Northern California university town that is known for its biking culture.

the official symbol of our city greets both visitors and residents

Our small  city is a national pioneer in  bicycle friendly roads and traffic systems, and has apparently been named the most bicycle friendly small city in America. We have more than 100 miles of paved bike paths that run through our neighborhood greenbelts, and we are home to the US Bicycling Hall of Fame. Any family garage is likely filled with more bikes (various types depending on child age, like bike seats, burleys and tag alongs) than cars. (I love it.)

So recently I was thrilled when I stumbled upon a new outdoor art installation near my daughter’s school.

Our kids like to choose which color is their favorite. (I like lime green).  While I am grateful for art like this, I am even more grateful for living in a city – an American city – where you can still ride and see bicycles everywhere.( Some say we have more bikes than people here.) Even if suburban-like  streets replace cobblestone  (cobblestone hurts more when you fall, just ask me) and the women wear dorky (but safe!) bike helmets instead of fashionable shoes.

What is your favorite bicycle-friendly city?